Tuesday, March 09, 2004

Spring and horny strangers

Spring is here, as evidenced by the number of men in the streets who seek to inform me of my breast size, or of their desire to have sex with me.

Incidentally, none of the strangers who came up in the street to ask me for sex have ever gotten lucky, usually simply because I have enough acquaintances that I find desirable so that don't have to have sex with strangers, and on the very few occasions in my life when I wanted to have sex with strangers I picked them up at bars and university parties. In any case, the street guys are just wasting their time and mine, except that of course they don't know it.

In winter they are in hybernation. In spring they crawl out and start asking. In the really high summer there are usually a few who don't even speak any Finnish or English.

Of the ones who approach me here in Finland about 40% are Finns, 30% are Africans, 20% are Middle Easterners and 10% are from elsewhere. Finns are usually drunk; the rest of them less so.

Finns usually start by informing me that I have large breasts, usually looking like they are reporting a great scientific discovery to a person for whom to must be big news. The desire to say "Oh, really? I didn't know" or "Or my god! What happened? They were only size A yesterday!" is overwhelming, and sometimes I do. One Vappu night while waiting for a bus I even managed to convince an extremely drunk guy that they are not really big and that he is just seeing a hallucination. After informing me of my breast size they usually ask for sex. Finns also often offer money. The good thing about them is that the vast majority of them understand "thanks, but no thanks" and just leave politely. Those who don't usually need just a little demonstration of my inner beauty to send them running.

Africans and Middle Easterners are a lot stickier. They sometimes follow me for 10-20 minutes or more, trying to convince me that I should want to have sex with them. They are usually fairly repetitive and incredulous at the suggestion that someone doesn't want to have sex with them, although apparently there are a lot of people that don't. Mentioning the boyfriend rarely helps, since they claim they can be better boyfriends than the one I already have. Many of them claim to want to be just friends, but, in spite of being friends with a number of men, I have a certain reservation about the ones suddenly offering their friendship in the streets, especially since they tend to balk at the proposal that they go and try to be friends with that guy over there (usually pointing to some friendly-looking guy).
To their honor Africans rarely play the racism card, but they often play the "black men have bigger dicks" card.

BTW, have any of my male readers ever been approached in the street by an African or Middle Eastern man for the purpose of being friends?

Last year I started asking those insistent African/Middle Eastern guys whether their approach ever works. So far the only answer was "no".

The most amuzing encounter last year was an Indian or Bangladeshi (guessing from appearance) man who told me that black guys have bigger dicks. No, he wasn't black.

And in case any of you who don't know me in person are wondering, I am not particularly pretty or anything. Just big-breasted and walk in downtown a lot.


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