Sunday, April 18, 2004

For those who can read Russian

I highly recommend this posting. This is a collection of Russia people's quotes on sexual matters, put together by the journalist Alexey Vinogradov.

For those of you who cannot read Russian here are a few samples in my translation:

"...how do you recognize a decent man from an asshole if they all have the same thing on their minds?" (woman, 33)

"...I don't understand much about sex yet, I've had some boys and I've had some men. Six in total. But they did not teach me anything new about sex. What the first boy showed me in on the stairs when we were in ninth grade, that was it. Nothing new. Boring. Maybe I should get married already..." (girl, 19)

"...my sadistic former husband found out that when he worked in the evenings I brought my lover home and had sex with him everywhere, even on the wide windowsill. The asshole hammered a long nail into the windowsill sharp side up... I sat on it... (woman, 31)

"...I opened my eyes and suddenly noticed that the cadet was having sex with me without taking his pants off. 'Asshole,' - I thought..." (girl, 23)

"...how do you check if a guy has a condom on? It happens so fast and in the dark or with my eyes closed..."

"...you can tell a decent man from an indecent one by balls. Decent men wash them and indecent men scratch them..." (woman, 38)

"...I had never seen my husband's peepee before the wedding, which is too bad, I would have thought whether I should really marry that fishing hook..." (woman, 37)

"...once I had sex with a nouveau rich out of stupidity. There was a lot of stuff in his place. The worst was the toilet: never seen a toilet bowl with a muffler..." (woman, 35)

"...I've been working in a kiosk for a while and watched how men buy condoms: if a man is buying condoms and chocolate he is going to his mistress, if condoms and cigarettes, then to his wife, and if he is just buying condoms he is not going anywhere, just being hopeful..." (woman, 34)

"...I was writing to four girls from the army, but none of them bothered to wait for me..." (boy, 21)

"...there are crazy people everywhere nowadays. There is one in our building. He follows women, raises their skirts and shows them his dick. He has shown me his dick too. Who lets such crazy people out of the hospital? He, I heard, eats cats and slleps with an inflatable rubber woman from a store. Once he even got divorced from her. Got angry at her and kicked her out onto the stairs, picked her up only an hour later..." (girl, 19)

"...the Levante-pantyhose did not survive my date with the 30-year-old man who appreciated the soul the most in a woman..."

"...she returned even from Sochi still a virgin..." (girl, 19)

"...we saw a porno movie with girls and discussed every scene. In principle nothing new. But they scream louder than us..." (girl, 19)

"...I haven't had any romantic evenings yet, and that's why I would like to meet a young man who has money..." (girl, 18)

"...every summer city girls come to our village and bring gonorrhea, and then we treat it all winter..." (man, 26)

"...three teenagers borrowed an inflatable woman from one guy and loved her all together with all the passion of unrequited love. Unfortunately one of the teenagers had gonorrhea. He infected his rubber partner and she in turn shamelessly infected the other guys..."

"...when you have sex with a student of a pedagogical institute, it's like torturing a real live teacher..." (man, 22)

"...this oral sex was considered a dirty perversion in our time. Of course people knew about it, and some even used it. Now such sex has become a norm. This is due to women's weakness: in the old times they were strong enough to attract and keep a man with the natural sexual relations, and now, excuse me for the exact comparison, women are literally grabbing men with their teeth..." (woman, 62)

"...I understood that I could not realize all my sexual fantasies at home. The local girls cannot understand what I want. Sex with two women is impossible in our village: they will kill each other... We have one gay guy, but he hides from everyone. In our village I have only managed to try sex between two men and one woman who was thirty years older than us. But she was very drunk and recently died of old age..." (man)


No comments: