Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Goatse meets jihad?

Via Jihad Watch:

An Iraqi man, Fadhel al-Maliki, got caught by LAX airport security with a magnet and wires up his ass.

Officials said he posed no apparent threat. They let the plane leave without the guy but with his luggage, which makes me wonder who is the biggest ass here.

Can anyone please tell me why a person would be carrying a magnet and wires up his ass in an airplane? I can think of only three reasons offhand:

1. He is making a terrorist "dry run" to see how well the airport security works.
2. He is trying to reinvent the vibrator in-flight.
3. He is stark raving mad.

There might of course be some more outlandish reasons, such as that aliens forgot said items during the anal probe or that he tried to perform one of the five daily prayers in low-cut trousers in a very bad company or that he imagined that the magnet had viagra-like properties. I only hope that the powers that be will:

- investigate the man's possible terrorist connections,
- inform him of the availability of ready-made sexual toys,
- tell him that crazy people here in the West have traditionally worn tinfoil hats as a substitute for a wired anal magnet,
- catch the employee who decided that the plane may be allowed to depart with this passenger's luggage and insert that luggage up his or her ass.

One more thing inquiring minds want to know: if this was a "dry run", does the guy expect some bonus extra virgins for performing this assignment?

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