Monday, January 07, 2008

A bit of fashion bashing

I generally try to disregard fashion trends, because I don't feel any personal need to follow them either in a positive or a negative way. I have, however, liked most of the trends of the last 10 years or so and now I notice that I feel sorry to see them go.

One reason for that is that I occasionally want to buy clothes, and it's not nice if everything in the stores looks quite awful. This is just a thought that came to my mind when I went through post-Christmas sales. OK, the actual thought was more along the lines of "hyi saatana!".

The eighties were the time of everything awful. But, while sometimes you can see a person who looks good in the eighties' clothes (I saw one myself in a store last spring, I swear! She had those awful black leggings that a lot of people wear with a skirt nowadays, but she forgot the skirt home, and she had a huge tent of a sweatshirt and very high heels, and she still looked good), I am quite sure there is nobody in the whole universe that looks good in anything with am empire waist. People always look like their tits are either way too small, or way too big, and they are pregnant, too. Those who actually are pregnant look like they are having triplets.

The trends in hair and makeup will probably turn to the worse too if eighties come back, but so far the really horrible things were few and far between. The good thing about the hair and makeup trends is that one does not need to be concerned about them at all, if one of not interested. The bad thing, at least for me, is that they tend to annoy me aesthetically a lot more: if people are wearing clothes that don't please my eye, I find it very easy to imagine them naked; I find it a lot harder to imagine them with decent hair and well-washed faces.

The most awful fashion thing I've seen lately was, however, something that I couldn't blame the eighties for. Since the early nineties there have been young men, and occasionally women, who wore their pants in a way that bared the top of their asscrack for the whole world to see. Last week, however, I saw two young men whose pants hung so low that you could also see the bottom of their asscracks, and the the top of their legs. (They did have underwear though - thank god for small favors.) I stared at those abominations, trying to figure out how those pants managed to stay in that position in violation of all the laws of god and man and gravity. The answer was, of course, that they didn't, and the owners had to hold on to them and pull them up every few seconds. To my great disappointment the guys were holding on tight and the abominable pants did not fall off.

Hope this doesn't spread.

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