A prayer, again

Dear Lord,

The people who smoke in our stairwell nowadays also congregate right outside the back door for a smoke in the mornings. This is a very good opportunity for smiting, don't miss it, but please mind the door. You could also do a bit of smiting of people who park their cars inside our gate and make it impossible for everyone else to get through, or at least their cars.

Could you please fix the front door? It does not look like it's ever going to be fixed without a divine intervention.

Please carry the (undoubtedly divine) concept of public transportation to the infidels living in the busless, subwayless and tramless desolate wilderness to the north of Kehä III, especially in the towns that contain our customers. Failing that make the customers move somewhere closer. Better yet, send us some customers who are located in nice touristy towns in warm but civilized countries, need us to visit them fairly often in winter and are willing to pay for the trips.

Guard my soul from the evil that are summer sales. On the second thought, don't.

Help me write the Lisp code for the new fucklift, and bless its serial bus so that it would continue to transmit mostly sensible messages. Charge the battery of that old laptop. Oh, never mind, I have asked Markus to do it already.

I think the people at the Ropecon are gonna have fun without any divine intervention, but if they get bored you could show them some aurora borealis or something.

Bestow a huge erection upon Killeri during the Ropecon to remind him about me. Extra points if he actually summons me there to help with it. Lots of extra points if we get caught having sex in some embarassing public place.

Heal grandma's rib ASAP, and while you are at it also give her some drugs to improve her mood and temper. No, I can't do it myself, I don't know where to get hold of such amounts of Ecstasy. Besides, when you do it it's Divine Intervention (tm), and if I do it it's "posession of a class B substance with intent to distribute".

Gaah! Now it's really late and nothing works yet! Give me a hand with that Lisp program, now! Or whatever divine appendage you have...